Before I Get to the Goat...

Just opened this guy's Heroes recap, but figured I'd write up my thoughts before I read his.

So they've once again started a new chapter. When we last left our intrepid simpletons and morons, Nathan was talking to Worf about rounding up all the Mutants because they were dangerous, but Magneto remembered the Nazi camps and Jean Grey made an impassioned plea to congress in Roy Thomson Hall. Wait... I'm confusing things.

Okay, the first part about Nathan and Worf was right.

Hiro lost his powers to Arthur Petrelli, but Ando got powers from a magic needle, which allowed him to make Speedygirl go so fast she travelled through time because Parkman has an understanding of Relativity commensurate to the knowledge gleaned from a Hostess Cupcake comic book. This meant they could rescue Hiro, but he still ain't not got no powers. Peter can fly because he needled himself and was near Nathan at the time. He saved Nathan, and Nathan disowned him and made friends with President Worf. Mohinder was beat up in a fire, Arthur was shot by Sylar, Sylar was knocked out by Noah and Mama P and Claire before Claire's mom blowed up Primatech. I think I've covered most of it...

Here be spoilers. By spoilers, I mean a complete description and breakdown of the episode. Highlight to read.

Nikki, or whatever her name is now (Tracy? Yah, that sounds right) gets naked after talking to Tron (we assume) on the phone all sultry-like. Nathan is talking on TV (he's head of Homeland Security now) as she gets tagged and bagged by some black-clothed solider guys. Ali Larter getting naked isn't really a bad thing, but it is pointless here... so we'll call it even.

Peter is a paramedic, which I'm not sure where that places him in the medical hierarchy compared to nurse. He wants to help people, but can't help everyone as his Iranian partner tells him. Oh, his partner is Iranian so he can subtly point out that Nathan talking about a "clear and present" danger (the hero-types) is a parallel to the real-world fear of people of Middle-East ancestry.

Peter gets in a cab, and of all the cabs in New York City, it happens to be Mohinder's. Well, it's good to know that in these trying economic times, a brilliant Indian geneticist who has worked for two shadow corporations, and has the knowledge of how to create superheroes can stil get a job as a taxi driver. It turns out everyone is staying under the radar since that whole super-soldier business a couple months back. Especially since they all know what Nathan's talking about (it isn't sex).

Oh, Peter was in the cab because Claire warned him that Nathan and his mom were going to "take down" Parkman... and him too, but she didn't really mention that even though she knew it. Peter decided to talk to his mom about it... because Peter still gets stupid when the plot requires it.

Yes, so far, Claire and Mohinder have been the smart ones.

Mohinder gets carjacked by the dude who took Tracy, and is told to drive up to a black SUV. He escapes with his super strength and general enhanced abilities (no spidery stuff though), and gets rescued by Noah... but not really.

Here's the part where my brain stops screaming. Noah's a "bad" guy again? Sweet. Ma Petrelli's still on the bad side, and Nathan leads them all. Common link? They all want to keep Claire safe and let her have a normal life. This will undoubtedly come into play.

Oh, and Claire was all worried that Sylar was still alive earlier. Nobody believes her, but she can "feel it". She was right.

The attempted takedown of Sylar was possibly the show's high point. He's so badass, they don't even know. Sylar is once again searching for answers, but he's not conflicted. His god-complex is in full effect, and he demands your respect bitches. Also, he's looking for his real family. The scene with him and the watchmaker was also great.

Parkman is upset Speedy is using her powers to be a courier. Parkman is a whiny bitch who is a mall cop. Mall cops are huge, just ask Paul Blartt. Parkman is also seeing the African guy... complete with head.

Why? Because Parkman's the prophet now. Yes, it's apparently not a normal power, but one that is bestowed upon someone. So the African dude got it after Mendes died? I mean, we know Peter, Sylar, and Arthur all had it too, but that was part of their thing. Just as Parkman figures this out, Claire shows up and he gets tasered.

Then there's the Hiro storyline. The ONLY way to telegraph this more would be to put up captions that said "in 2 minutes, this is going to happen." We get it, they don't know Ando has powers, and they also don't know Hiro doesn't. Good thing Hiro tagged both Ando AND himself with GPS tags! Also good that Hiro gave Ando the most obvious clue in the world to the password to track him. Of course Hiro gets kidnapped and Ando doesn't. What a fucking second.. Hiro was in Japan! How the hell can Homeland Security take down someone in the middle of fucking Tokyo?

Whatever... everyone gets herded into a plane, Claire stows away (because Nathan let her go and she's too bad ass and cares too much to let that shit fly).

Now here's where they take a left turn. Peter's ability has been adjusted. Now, to get the powers of someone else, he has to TOUCH them. No more just absorbing through induction. Luckily, he was seated next to Mohinder and they could pinky-swear or something. He breaks free, then accidentally touches Tracy, which causes him great surprise when he freezes a hole into the plane wall! People start getting sucked out, including some random powered person whose face we don't see, so therefore they aren't important. Peter looks very scared about getting sucked out, even though he can fly. Mohinder grabs him just as he's about to be sucked out of the plane

Or can he? Maybe his powers have changed so that not only does he have to have physical contact, but that he can only have one ability at a time. Who knows? The writers are morons and will either not explain this or forget about it.

Meanwhile, Claire goes to the cockpit to tell them to land, but daddy Noah is the co-pilot (suprisingly, not Jesus), and he's surprised to see Claire. Then the plane crashes.

Next week - the Heroes learn about teamwork. Gag.

Okay, despite the sarcasm, I didn't mind this episode. A reboot was needed. Sylar as a bad-ass is the only way Sylar should be. Mohinder as not evil is better, since he was shitty bad guy. If they can keep Mohinder and Claire from being morons, then there may be hope for them. If they can stop people from getting temporary stupiditis, there's hope. If they make Hiro a liability since he has no powers, that could be cool, especially if they somehow need Ando and his help comes with the condition of Hiro staying around (Ando is still free, but tracking Hiro). Where's Speedy? She'll show up I'm sure. Kinda weak how they decided we still need a prophet to draw the future.

I would have LOVED for the plan crash to be fatal to 90% of the characters. I'd be happy with Noah and Sylar being the only major holdovers, everyone else is disposable. That's not going to happen though, but maybe having the heroes as fugitives, and all together finally could be good. The episode was fairly straightforward, had some strong performances, and was generally likeable. I'll give them some leeway on character changes and new directions for the sake of saving the show.